How Two Idiots from Tampa Bay Screwed Justin Verlander Out of a Cy Young

Somewhere in the continental US, inside a dark cave littered with discarded Cracker Jack prizes and one withered copy of a Bill James Handbook with suspiciously sticky pages, sits an underappreciated baseball writer waiting for a chance to force their relevancy unto the world. That chance presents itself every year during MLB award season and just like the way Kate does it when she Cleveland Steamer’s her hard-hurling hubby, two writers took a giant dump on Justin Verlander’s chest. Despite having a superior season and receiving more first-place votes, Verlander finished second in the Cy Young voting behind Boston’s Rick Porcello.


The scoring discrepancy came from a pair of Tampa Bay-based writers who left Verlander off their ballot completely. That may not sound like much, but keep in mind that only 30 writers are given a vote, and each one is asked to choose their top-five selections. By omitting the guy that should’ve won the award from their list, two idiots from a city that doesn’t even give a f**k about their own team cost Verlander his second Cy Young. So many things are wrong here: 1) Even if you didn’t think he should’ve won, how do you not include him at all? 2) How does a guy get six (!) more first-place votes and finish in second? That’s like someone winning a popular vote and not winning an electi–wait… 3) Corey Kluber also had better numbers than Porcello and finished third. 4) Why, in 2016, are we still relying on such an archaic form of award voting? 5) Why does Tampa Bay still have a team? 6) Why is Florida still a state? Ok, that last one was a low-blow, but you get the point.

kate-uptonOur intention here is not to take anything away from Rick Porcello or the amazing season he delivered for the Sox. We are simply calling out the dated idiocy of a broken system. The scary thing is that “dated” is becoming a word synonymous with the game of baseball, mostly due to a stubborn, almost religious devotion to traditions in desperate need of a revamp. This latest snafu serves as another wake-up call for the commissioner and the league’s brass to step into the present, hopefully this time they don’t hit snooze…

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