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The 4 Most Egregious Misconceptions About LA Sports Fans

East Coast snobs all have the same image of the LA sports fan: a douchey, apathetic agent-type who only goes to games for networking. There’s a common belief that because everyone in Los Angeles is a transplant, there’s no passionate fandom. I’ve heard Boston guys who jerk off to the thought of Tom Brady jerking off spit some absolute nonsense about patrons of professional Los Angeles teams, and it’s time to set the record straight…

No 4: They Leave Every Game Early To Beat Traffic

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Well, this one’s true. But people outside of LA don’t understand what it takes mentally, emotionally, and physically to get to Staples Center or Dodger Stadium during rush hour. If you get to a regular season Doyer game, cheer on the Little Puigies for seven full innings and leave when LA’s up 7-1, does that make you a shitty fan? Wait…it does? Well, fuck it. Maybe we aren’t as ardent as you crazy fucks in the Northeast…

No 3: There Are No True LA Fans Because Everyone’s A Transplant

This one’s ridiculous. Have you ever been to Southern California? Do you know how many people live here? Los Angeles (think Hollywood, Santa Monica, Venice) does have a lot of transplants, but every town along the 10 East past downtown doesn’t. All of that being said, if you see girls with massive fake boobs like the ones above, there’s a good chance they’ve relocated to Los Angeles to “act” in “movies” filmed in shady parts of the San Fernando Valley…

No 2: Lakers Fans Are More Passionate Than Dodgers Fans

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Not true at all. The Lakers were just really good for like 20 years and the Dodgers sucked balls. Los Angeles baseball fans proved in last year’s playoffs that they can scream with the best of ’em…

No 1: Los Angeles Fans Are The Most Apathetic Of The Major Sports Cities

Here’s what fans from other parts of the country don’t understand: we’re not apathetic, we’re just too fucking cool for school. We’re born on a surfboard with a joint dangling from our lips. It’s not our fault that we don’t get as drunk or scream as much as our rivals in other major cities. We’re just as passionate, it’s just that we’re too busy driving our Priuses and worrying about climate change to freak the fuck out if an umpire misses a close call…

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