Misc.

The 7 Most Indefensible Haircuts in Sports

Since the beginning of the 21st century, more fashion trends have come and gone than Oakland Raiders head coaches. Some, like the shift toward reasonably sized jeans, have been a boon to society, while others, like bleached blond tips, have made us question the priorities of humankind. These athletes bucked all of the trends, choosing to forge their own path, and the results weren’t pretty.

No 7: Andrei Kirilenko

kirilenko

If between 2001 and 2014 you were wondering how Carol Brady suddenly shot up 18 inches and started running around a basketball court, you’re not alone. At least Kirilenko’s tresses were somewhere close to the realm of normality, as opposed to…

No 6: Tim Tebow

tebow

Was Tebow under the impression that the world was laughing with him when he undertook this foolhardy initiation campaign? Although more innocuous than many forms of hazing, the infliction of this travesty on the world was an insult to both the faithful and nonbelievers the world over.

No 5: David Beckham

beckham

Little known fact: Beckham will make a brief appearance as a distant Lannister cousin on the upcoming season of Game of Thrones.

No 4: Marouane Chamakh

Some men embrace the baldness. Some go the synthetic route. The Moroccan forward circumvented all precedent and opted to grow out and gel the crap out of the 16 hairs left on his head. That the in-game announcers don’t talk about this constantly is inexplicable.

No 3: Brooks Reed

reed

This mop could be put to much better use cleaning up the mess Reed and his fellow Falcons left on the field in Super Bowl LI.

No 2: Iman Shumpert

shumpert

When looking to intimidate opponents, sporting the human hair equivalent of this hat is not going to help your case:

waldo

No 1: Taribo West

taribowest

There’s just too much to say about this obligatory inclusion on any list of nausea-inducing hairstyles. Whether West was trying to one-up his presumable long-lost cousin Kanye or is actually a Doctor Seuss character come to life, no one can say for sure.

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